I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
We're too hungover to prance.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
