youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
