too bad you live with your parents still
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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