guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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