You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
