your parents love me but you hate me
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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