Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
