is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize