2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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