so that wasnt chicken after all
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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