You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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