gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
