Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
sarcasm needs its own font
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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