i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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