If that was your dad, he is hot
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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