I can tuck mytits in my pants
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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