you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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