I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
