I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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