i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
