Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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