Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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