So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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