from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
