Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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