She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
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