She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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