I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
