Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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