Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
So here I am, sexting at work.
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