my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
