He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
