you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
