First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
