new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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