I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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