Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
