I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
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Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
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He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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