Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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