smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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