you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
