i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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