her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
This couple is walking their pig around campus
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize