I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
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