i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
