so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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