none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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