Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
