I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
