If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
